As I am writing this right now I am sitting in the from yard, with Tyson, listening to music, and feeling the warmth of the sun. There is a slight breeze, which is a welcome change from the super strong winds we have had the last few days. If I could describe a one of my favorite kinds of afternoons, this would be one of them. There is such a feeling of peace, contentment, gratefulness, and happiness in me right now.
This place, the front yard with my dog and perfect weather, is one of my happy places. We all need a place like this. Other happy places of mine are the beach, the swing in our backyard, almost anywhere I am with my nieces, outside on our patio with my mom, the car rides my friends and I have, Disneyland, a concert, and my bed at night when Tyson actually lets me cuddle up with him. That is what I am most grateful about this process. It has taught me to open up my eyes and to see the wonderful things around me. And the amazing thing is they were all there before, I just couldn't see them.
Sure, I have bad days still. I have my days when the sadness and anxiety creeps back in. The thing that is different now is that I can see through those feelings. Before it was like I was in a fog, I couldn't see all the things around me on the other side of that fog. I still get stuck in the fog from time to time, but now I understand that it will lift by remember the simples things and places on the other side of it.
Day 189- Scary Story- One summer when I was an early teenager my family and I were at the beach. My brother and I were boogie boarding most of the afternoon, but the waves started getting too big so we decided to go in. The wave that took me in ended up tossing me so badly I pretty much got swallowed up by the wave. I'm sure I was under water for only 5 seconds, but it felt like 5 minutes. Needless to say, it scared me...BAD. Ever since I don't go too far out in the ocean anymore, especially when there are large waves.
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