For the longest time I was not sure if I ever wanted to get married. Growing up in a society where half of marriages fail, the idea didn't seem very promising. It's not like I had a bad example of what marriage is suppose to be. Sure, my parents have had their ups and downs like all couples, but this year they will be celebrating 36 years together. I even come from a group of lasting marriages. Out of all of my closest friends only 1 or 2 have divorced parents. All the others have had parents who have been married for years.
I think a lot of my opposition towards was actually not that. I think that is was actually my response to a fear of ending up alone. If I said I didn't want to get married, then I wouldn't be disappointed if that is the way it ended up. The thing I have realized this year is I do in fact want to get married. I want to have someone to build and share a life with. I want to have the opportunity to have a wedding all my family and friends can come to. Most importantly, I don't to be alone when I'm in my older years.
Sometimes I think that this process would have been easier if I was in a relationship. Other times I know I would have been a terrible girlfriend/wife because I was so focused on me and actually rather selfish. Now though, I think I am finally in a place that is a relationship comes along I would value and appreciate it so much more.
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