When my mom was a kid people would ask her what she wanted to be when she grew up. She would always reply with, "A mom and a wife." My parents got married young and they enjoyed a few years just as a married couple. When they finally started to try and have kids it wasn't as easy as they thought. But after a couple years they were finally pregnant. But a few months later everything changed.
My mom had gone in for a regular ultra sound check up. She says she remembered when the ultra sound nurse told her to wait, she had to go get the doctor. My mom, who was alone because my dad was at work, knew almost immediately that something was wrong. It was at this appointment that she was told that I was going to be born with most of my stomach organs on the outside. The doctors told her that they would do everything they could to save me, but that no baby had been born with anything like this at the hospital, and that my parents shouldn't get their hopes up about bringing a baby home. My mom says she distinctly remembers going home that night and closing my bedroom door that day. She told me once that she couldn't imagine walking past my finished nursery every day not knowing if there would ever be a baby in it.
When I was born my mom had to have a c-section. Since I was the first baby born at the hospital like this, they had all the medical students up top watching. Most women you ask will say child birth isn't as glamours as some make it out to be, but it is still an amazing experience. Imagine it if you can though, your first pregnancy, a bunch of bright lights on you, a huge audience watching, and you still aren't sure if your child will live. There is nothing exciting about that.
After I was born I was almost immediately taken off to surgery. My mom wasn't allowed to see me because she was getting stitched up, but she did hear the doctors tell my dad as he was signing the papers to allow surgery that "We will try and save her, but her arm will probably fall off." Obviously I did live and my arm didn't fall off because I'm writing this right now with both hands. After surgery my parents were not able to touch me until the next day, and it was almost 3 weeks before they could hold me plus another 2 weeks after that before I could go home. Talk about a tough month, especially for a woman who had only ever wanted to be a mom.
Since then I haven't made it easy for my parents. I have had 12 other surgeries since, including 2 open heart surgeries (one of which I actually died during), as well as a few other hospital stays. Through all of those times my mom has never left my side. She was always there before surgery, when I woke up, and stayed every night I was in the hospital right by my bed side. In between those times when I was healthy she took me to every doctors appointment, took me to every soccer practice, and was at every school event.
Even now with all my recent issues she has been right there. She might not always understand what it's like to have anxiety, but she listens and offers me advice. She will even stay with me until I fall sleep from time to time when it's really bad, just like when I was little. I haven't always been the best kid. I have had moments where I have been selfish, mean, and ungrateful. I think every kid has though as they grow up. Through it all though my mom has never stopped loving me.
That's the thing that is the best about my mom. She is the most selfless person I know. She would do anything and be anything for her family. If I can even be half as caring and selfless as she is I would be ok with that. A lot of my anxieties have been worrying about how I will survive without my mom, but if I keep her close, enjoy every moment with her, and share my memories with others, she will live on forever through me. And that's almost as amazing as her.
So to all the moms out there, and to my mom especially, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!
P.S. I love you, mom.
Day 42- Thing I Love to Do........Run errands with my mom.
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